“Be C@#€fuk”

She was about to do a backflip into the Cenote*. Her friend yelled at her “be careful”. After a few hesitant seconds, she changed her mind and didn’t jump.How many times do you find yourself in her shoes? You’re about to push your edge and challenge yourself when a well meaning friend calls in the … More “Be C@#€fuk”

Se Feliz!

It’s perfectly normal to be eating in a restaurant in Mexico, simple or fancy, and a street peddler or beggar walks in and begs/offers their wares among tables. No one bothers them and a simple “No. Gracias” will send them off. When you walk into a business, expect to meet the whole family; kids, relatives, … More Se Feliz!

Soy Agua!

“You’re water. Water takes the shape of the container it’s in. You too, you adapt easily to circumstances around you”. I had just met Pi for the first time a mere 10 minutes before he made this observation. That was the best compliment! Water resonates with me on many levels.My karate teacher used to say … More Soy Agua!

Stars never die

A celebrity, an icon, bigger than life. I grew up watching him on TV. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would meet him in person, let alone have him as my mentor, inspiration and friend. The day he told me “براڤو عليكى يا هاله!” (Well done, Hala) after seeing my performances, … More Stars never die

Believing the News

“What’s the biggest difference between here and Egypt?”, a friend asked me when I moved to the USA, (North Carolina) a long time ago. She expected some sob story about the plight of women, who need to be rescued from male oppressors by enlightened western minds. I could see the disbelief and disappointment on her … More Believing the News

Pacha Mama shimmies…

My host’s face suddenly changed to an expression of panic when we heard the horn. He grabbed Negra, his dog, and said “C’mon! Sismo!”. My Spanish isn’t that good yet, but I certainly understood ‘sismo’ (earthquake). He lived on the first floor so it didn’t take long to be in the street with lots of … More Pacha Mama shimmies…

New Religion!

“How can they tolerate that thing on their face?”, my non-Muslim friends would ask about Muslim women who wear the niqab (face cover). “I would suffocate!” they would say.“They believe they’re doing the right thing”, I would answer. “In their beliefs, God wants them to do that”.“Why?” My friends would ask.“They believe that they have … More New Religion!

Love Death! Part 2

“We’ll talk when I see her next time”, I thought to myself. My cousin wrote me a letter raising some questions about my beliefs. I knew it was going to be a long, difficult conversation and I decided to have it face to face. She was a young mother with 2 healthy boys, a beautiful … More Love Death! Part 2

Love Death!

Life is full of endings, losses and deaths. From sunsets, graduations, moving, promotions to ends of relationships, jobs and of course, lives. Death is part of nature. We are part of nature. Death is part of us! Yet, we, as a human culture, don’t talk about it much, don’t discuss it and when it, inevitably … More Love Death!

The Fear Virus!

Your fear is not my reality. I know you feel it, think it and believe it. I don’t. We share the same physical world yet our experiences and realities are different. Love, trust and freedom are my Goddesses. They are not a threat to you unless you project your fears onto them. Your fear projections … More The Fear Virus!

Journey to Love

The voices in my head said: “you’ll be criticized. They’re going to laugh at you. No one will take you seriously”. I believed them so I didn’t share my passions. Whenever I found myself with loving supportive people who expressed interest in what I have to offer, I shared. Every time I dared to bare … More Journey to Love

Violence

Violence is not only physical force, crime, weapons and war, that’s just the final manifestation of it. Violence starts every time you live out of alignment with your true nature. Every time you say ‘yes’ when you’re a ‘no’, you’re being violent. Every time you say ‘no’ when you’re a ‘yes’, you’re being violent. Every … More Violence

No Words Needed

“I want to die”, she kept saying, “Enough of this”. As a doctor, she knew there was no way out of her ailment alive. Shortly after my Mom turned 80, her mind and body started a fast spiral down. Dementia was turning the lights off in one part of her body after another, like a … More No Words Needed

Plans Derailed

When I decided to go to California, I felt resistance and resentment. I was planning to meet my beloved, Russ, in Paris, celebrate his birthday on a Mediterranean island, enjoy the last bit of European summer before migrating south. Instead, his birthday started in a dusty, messy house, with junk all around us, I had … More Plans Derailed

Dance Miracles!

My mother was shocked when I told her. Shocked is a gross understatement. You’re shocked when you park your car in one spot and find it in another, but what’s the word for when your world turns upside down? When you see the sun rising in the west? That’s how disturbed my mom felt and … More Dance Miracles!

Reborn Free!

My soul sought a way out of a place where logic is merely a theoretical idea, a prisoner in books. Set free only when beneficial to an oppressive purpose and typically to the most illogical of explanations. “God loves us and therefore we must fear him”, that’s ‘logic’. “Women menstruate and therefore cannot be trusted … More Reborn Free!

Grounded!

Life is all fun and games until you accidentally fall and fracture a toe or two. Luckily it happened while I’m home in California among family and friends. I’m flying high in a Contact Improv dance engagement. One slip. I’m on the floor with intense pain in my foot. I guess the universe is telling … More Grounded!

Touch&Play

Dancing is playful, flowy, spontaneous, sexy and creative. What if we let the flow carry us away? What if there were no limits except those that we feel in the moment and express as we feel them? We have mutual respect, trust, honesty and self responsibility. No big brother to protect, control or guarantee. No … More Touch&Play

Divine Masculine

Dear Universe, I yearn for beautiful strong divine masculine to take me. To feel my energy and dance with it; caress like the breeze, flow like water, ignite the flames of my fires and ground me like the earth. The divine masculine that can meet me in power without being threatened. That can meet my … More Divine Masculine

Golden Eggs

“But it smells like rotten eggs!” I said. “If you can get over the smell, it’s good for your stomach” my friend said. “It’s burning hot!” I said. “Wait till it cools down a little. Drink it warm”. So I waited, inhaled, held my breath and drank the sulphur spring water. It tastes OK if … More Golden Eggs

Zegg

“What will you gain if you gave up consumerism?” Achim posed this question to us at the end of Zegg Summer Festival. Freedom, connectedness, more time with loved ones, slower pace of life, more love, deeper connections with oneself and others, simpler life…etc are some of the answers that came up. Then it dawned on … More Zegg

Slov-enia/akia

You know how when you’re traveling in Germany, and someone asks: “what brings you to Austria?” and it dawns on you, for the 10th time: “Right! I’m in Austria, not Germany. Austria, Austria, Austria” (hoping to remember this time)? For the locals, I’m sure Germany and Austria are worlds apart. But the dumb tourist in … More Slov-enia/akia

Who’s Rich?

We didn’t have shampoo, conditioners, sun screen, shower gel, moisturizers, shaving cream or any other so called beauty products. Yet we were beautiful, happy and healthy. No detergents, fabric softeners or even dryers. No microfibers in our food, water or bodies. We used olive oil soap and loofahs to wash our bodies. The same soap … More Who’s Rich?

Life on dance!

When you see me dance, you’re not seeing me… dance, you’re witnessing my naked soul soar. I’m not the “me” that you and I know. When I dance, my soul breaks free from my body, from restrictions, from thoughts and it flies. There are no boundaries when I dance, no limits, no ego, no time … More Life on dance!

Ich bin ein Berliner

Berlin is the San Francisco of Europe; diverse, international, colorful, cultural hub and each neighborhood is its own microcosm. One can find anything under the sun; from corporate chains to a very vibrant alternative culture and everything in between. It’s the European melting pot complete with homeless people, leftist movements claiming their own neighborhood, visible … More Ich bin ein Berliner

Behind the Sun

Egypt was bitter sweet, very bitter and very sweet. Celebrating Eid with my brother’s family: very sweet! My brother couldn’t join us: very bitter. Playing with my adorable grandniece and grandnephews: super sweet. My brother cannot see them: painfully bitter. Snorkeling daily in the Red Sea: heavenly! My brother sees the sun only 1 hour … More Behind the Sun

Ancient Wisdom

Walking the quiet streets of Dahab in Egypt, we saw a Bedouin woman milking a goat… onto the street. No receptacle to collect the milk, no kid (baby goat) to drink the milk, just letting the milk spill on the street and soak into the dirt. “What a waste!” I thought, “that’s very unlike the … More Ancient Wisdom

Metamorphosis

We all know what to expect from McDonald’s, Starbucks…etc. There is comfort in uniformity and knowing what to expect. Someone far away decides the contents and form of your food and you trust and accept. #Franchising is as old as #religion ; you see a religious image and know exactly what it means. I saw … More Metamorphosis

Holy Guacamole!

As a devout atheist, one tree has a much higher spiritual content for me than all the temples, churches, mosques, synagogues and other human made holy guacamoles. However, my consumer trained mind sees a price tag on something and it thinks “it must be worth seeing”! That’s how I end up visiting special holy guacamoles … More Holy Guacamole!

Monkey Business

They work in pairs. The younger one distracts me with his looks and cuteness, he’s all over me, caresses my face, plays with my hair, his soft skin against my face feels so good. While the older, more experienced one goes straight for my backpack. Monkey business, the real deal! #monkeyforest #monkeybusiness #monkey #bali #indonesia … More Monkey Business

Embracing the shadows

“We cannot erase people’s traumas, but we can give them positive memories to overcome the effects of negative ones” Jeroen taught us in his freediving coach training (diving without scuba gear). And that: lots of positive memories, he delivered! In 10 days, I got over a long list of fears, some I didn’t even know … More Embracing the shadows

Heaven and Hell

What’s the difference between heaven and hell? The same moment, circumstances and environment can be either heaven or hell depending on what we choose to focus on. I have been practicing switching back and forth to increase my capacity for choosing my reality and living consciously. It’s very simple and never fails: think of past … More Heaven and Hell

My Addiction is…

I’ve had the habit ever since I remember. Sometimes I surrender to it and sometimes I resist. I can stop whenever I want, I believe, but what’s the point? When I think “I should stop”, that only lasts until I see the next opportunity then I’m on it again. The sweet sensations of freedom, excitement … More My Addiction is…

Apo Island

The Philippines consists of 7641 islands, many disappear in high tide. So if you are on one of those, forget about the multiplication tables, memorize your tide tables. Apo island doesn’t disappear in high tide despite being very small. It’s basically a couple of pointy rocks jutting out of the ocean, with a village on … More Apo Island

Traveling Sola

“Are you traveling alone? Why?” “Where’s your husband?” “Why isn’t he with you?”… are some of the questions people keep asking me in the Philippines. They might as well be saying:”Where’s your owner? How come you’re not on leash?” The concept of a free unattached woman traveling by herself seems to be alien to them. … More Traveling Sola

Dear My Fear

Dear my Fear, Our relationship hasn’t been the smoothest or the most amiable. You’re either controlling me, often paralyzing me, I’m ignoring you or following you then hating myself and your guts. Admittedly, sometimes you make me laugh with the ridiculous crazy thoughts you have. When you act up, you deprive us of living in, … More Dear My Fear

Choose Love!

The world is a mirror; it reflects back what we believe inside our heads! Once I clued in to this simple, yet profound fact, I realized that I have the power to create my reality and live whatever life I want. There is never one reality. There are always many ways to see and interpret … More Choose Love!

Filiplish

Filipino guy:”You ride me. We go wonderful. Eat the bitch. Then we come back 5″. Me:”Yes! Let’s go!”. Translation: “You ride with me. We go to the waterfalls. Eat at the beach. Then come back at 5 pm.” My fellow travelers and I were in stitches before we explained to the guy the importance of … More Filiplish

Change, Almighty!

Routine kills me. If I believed in a Goddess/God, it would be “Change”. Just like traditional Gods, Change saves me from painful experiences because I know they don’t last. However, unlike traditional Gods, Change can be felt and recognized by all living beings. No dogma or proselytizing necessary. It’s real. When I am in pain, … More Change, Almighty!

Cancer of the Earth

Two liquids of different densities don’t mix, like oil and water. But when two slightly different variants of the same liquid touch each other, you would expect them to blend together and produce a new homogeneous liquid. Right? Not in the Amazon! El Río Negro meets the Amazon River near Manaus, Brazil, they share a … More Cancer of the Earth

Fleas in a Jar

I lived in caves, boats, hostels, apartments, houses, hotels, resorts. Slept on the beach, in the fields, on couches, in hammocks, cars, benches, feather beds. Showered in the rain, oceans, rivers, sprinklers, bathrooms. Hitchhiked, walked barefoot, rode camels, horses, traveled by bicycles, motorcycles, cars, buses, trains, planes. Ate from dumpsters, fresh from the fields, grubs … More Fleas in a Jar

Fear not!

The human race has been seeped in a culture of fear and scarcity for several thousand years. All human made borders are drawn in blood. Countries appear and disappear through wars. If you are alive today, someone in your ancestry line must’ve killed people. It’s been so long that we have no clue what life … More Fear not!

Eat, Play, Love

I don’t like to lie. It complicates life and kills something beautiful inside me; the comfort and relaxation of just being me. However, there is one super delicious lie that set me and my dad free. It still makes me proud when I think about it. You see, my dad was very religious. He believed … More Eat, Play, Love

Into the desert

“In the desert, you can forget your swimsuit. ‘Cause there ain’t no one there to give you no pain”: My version of “Horse with No Name”!Just as there are 50 words for snow in the Eskimo language, I’m sure there are at least that number of different kinds of sand in the desert. They ALL … More Into the desert

Your Best “BET”!

“When you point a finger at someone, 3 fingers are pointing back at you”. When I find myself judging someone or something, I think of the 3 fingers: B.E.T; Body, Emotions and Thoughts. Let me explain…At the root of every judgement, there is fear or scarcity. Here’s my checklist to capture the source of my … More Your Best “BET”!

Hawaii Big Island

Out of the belly of mother Earth, new earth is being born. With fire and gases, out comes the scalding hot molten lava, oozing out slowly with burning desire for its unknown future. It’s​ met with the powerful outreaching waves of the ocean welcoming the new baby Earth. Water and fire meet, crash and blend … More Hawaii Big Island

Into the unknown…

Mucho amor de Costa Rica! Spent the first week decompressing; delicious tropical fruits, beautiful warm beaches, birds, LOTS of rain (with temperatures in the mid 80s °F/mid 20s °C), getting over a cold and feeding the insects. We also had a pool volleyball party and went Salsa dancing. Studying about “Non Violent Communication”, Eco communities … More Into the unknown…

The last straws

Our last remaining cat, Zuzu was diagnosed with chronic renal disease, his kidneys are failing. He’s only 9 years old. After losing Baby Semsem and Queen Keesha earlier this year, I feel like the Old Lady in “A Fish Called Wanda” except that it’s not funny anymore. It’s actually very sad and painful. 😦 Oct … More The last straws

Soaring spirits

I’m not here to remind you of your duties as a parent, a child, a spouse, an employee or a business owner. You have the rest of the world for that. I’m here to remind you to nourish your soul with dance. Feed your spirit with music. Enliven your body with movement. It takes courage … More Soaring spirits

The day love died

Keesha’s dead. My beloved companion of 11 years passed away today. The Queen is gone. She was the softest cat ever, had the sweetest personality and the cutest meow. I love her beyond reason and worship her kind, sweet soul. She had been losing weight for the past 2 months or so. Last Wed, the … More The day love died

The future is female!

Whoever controls women’s bodies, owns the future. Wouldn’t you rather be that person? It’s YOUR body after all. Nature is your best guide; if your body craves it, then it’s good. Whether it’s food, sex, movement, love, sunshine, touch, water, music, rest, exercise,…etc. Listen to your body and cherish it, it’s your ONLY faithful companion … More The future is female!

2016

Tonight, as we were leaving the house, Shawn noticed something in the road and said in horror “I think I saw Semsem”. So we drove around and came back to find our baby cat Semsem flattened on the street. Looked like a vehicle drove over her and flattened her like a pancake. RIP Semsem. She … More 2016

Dubai

Dubai in a nutshell: bla bla Mall…Mall…Tower…Tower… Mall…Mall…Tower…Mall…Tower…Tower…Mall…Mall… That said, it’s an architectural wonderland AND the safest place on earth I’ve been to; you can leave your valuables anywhere, unattended and no one will touch them. A unique phenomenon worth studying. Most say it’s because the strict laws and security cameras everywhere. I believe the … More Dubai

Costa Rica 2015

Today’s excitement: took the bus from Puerto Viejo to Limon to catch the water taxi to Tortuguerro National Park. 15 km before we get to Limon, I heard and felt a jolting thud. We got rear ended. I was hoping the driver would just keep going but there was white smoke coming from the back … More Costa Rica 2015

Costa Rica

Still processing the transformative power of Costa Rica’s beauty and magic after spending 3 wonderful weeks there. It felt like a 3-weeks long orgasm! If Kenya and New Zealand had a baby, it would be Costa Rica. Most compelling of all is the abundance of life in all its forms; birds, animals, reptiles, jungles, insects, … More Costa Rica

Travel

The Dark Side: Having lived in concrete jungles all my life, my natural instincts don’t work very well in the green jungles. I was hazardous to myself, other people and the wildlife. In my first few days in Costa Rica, I almost sat on a snake, walked face first into a poisonous spider web and … More Travel

Travel benefits

When I was young, my dad used to always say “travel has 7 benefits”. I can’t remember what they are now but, in my experience, the benefits of travel are much more than that. They are as many as the people you meet, the things you learn and the “traveler moments” you have. Those are … More Travel benefits